Impotence

Not being able to get an erection is usually referred to as erectile dysfunction or impotence and, particularly since the launch of Viagra, men are finally beginning to talk about the condition. The truth is, however, that most men will experience impotence at some time or another. It's a fact of life, it's not uncommon and it's often temporary. However, it's important to separate physical and psychological impotence.

Physical impotence

This is usually the result of exhaustion, recreational drugs or too much alcohol but other reasons include:

Certain prescription medications, eg sedatives and anti-depressants.

High blood pressure and/or high cholesterol and heart disease.

Other illnesses, eg diabetes, Parkinson's disease and multiple sclerosis.

Faulty plumbing in your cock and/or traumatic injury and surgery.

Smoking and /or being overweight.

Psychological impotence

If you can get an erection but not necessarily when you want to, the problem is likely to be a psychological one. Reasons are likely to include lack of sexual stimulation, fear of performance, low self-esteem, stress and depression.

It may sound obvious but if you're not turned on you're not likely to get an erection. For example, you may not find someone as attractive as you used to, or something which once aroused you sexually may have lost its allure which is one of the reasons why we experiment sexually. The significance we place on sex, performance and physical perfection creates high expectations - of ourselves and our partners - which can be impossible to meet. Consequently, a fear that we cannot perform adequately can affect our ability to get a hard-on, although it doesn't mean you don't feel horny. This can make the situation doublyfrustrating. Physically, if we're uncomfortable with our bodies or the way we look, or if we don't feel good or relaxed about ourselves, getting an erection can be a major problem. Ironically, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and what turns you off about yourself can easily turn someone else on.


Steps to solving impotence

Acknowledging that there is a problem is the first step. In the first instance, it can be helpful talking it through with a friend or your partner, difficult though this may be. Then, you should see your sexual health clinic, GP or one of the contact organisations in the back of this book. Embarrassment prevents many men from seeking help, making them miserable and putting strain on their personal and social life. Determining the source of impotence will determine the treatments, which and include changes to existing medication, prescription drugs eg Viagra and/or counselling/therapy. As a first step, you could also try one of the many herbal suppliments available online, including the best selling Rise Stimulant

This online advice guide is an extract from the book TOGETHER, by kind permission of Patriic Gayle and Gay Times Books. The book itself is over 300 pages long and contains:

several chapters more useful advice and information

more in-depth information in some chapters

more pictures and tables

further contacts at the end of each chapter

a comprehensive listing of gay and health organisations

Described by Qx magazine as a 'Gay Bible', Together Book is a practical reference work no bookshelf should be without.

Available from Prowler Stores and all good bookshops, or click the link below for price and ordering details.

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